Your Spouse Is Not Your Enemy

Sep 25, 2025 • Mike McLeod

In the heat of conflict or frustration, it’s easy to forget that your spouse is not your enemy. This powerful session uncovers the spiritual and emotional dynamics that often divide couples and shows how Scripture calls husbands and wives to fight for each other, not against each other.

Drawing from Proverbs and other biblical principles, this study will help couples recognize the real enemy—division, pride, unforgiveness, and spiritual opposition—and equip them to walk in unity, grace, and understanding. Through honest reflection and practical application, couples will learn how to guard their hearts, communicate with love, and pursue peace together, as one.

Verses:

Jeremiah 17:9

John 3:16

Romans 13:14

Proverbs 14:1

Matthew 7:24-27

Revelations 12:7-10

Genesis 2:24-25

Genesis 3:1

1 Peter 5:8

Matthew 6:33

Romans 8:13

Ephesians 4:34, 5:20-22, 25

Discussion Questions:

Icebreaker: Fill in the blank. I know my spouse isn’t my enemy because they love me even though I ____________________________. (ex. I leave my clothes on the floor, snooze my alarm 10 times, etc.)

1. Read Leviticus 18:1-5. How does this passage guide us in how we should conduct ourselves within marriage?

2. In what ways can we tear down our marriages/spouse with our words, attitudes, or actions?

3. Read Isaiah 64:8. What can you do to surrender control over to God to change and shape your spouse into what He wants to?

4. Are there areas in your own life that you are resisting being molded by God?

5. Since you’re both clay in the potter’s hands, how can you support each other in the shaping process, especially when it’s uncomfortable?

Study Companion